 30 april 2000 transient between here and there which is where i want to be only in nightmares
Nighttime driving, alone. The sunroof must have been open. How else would this creature have gotten into the car? It landed on my right shoulder, small, four-legged, and furry. I wiggle and swerve, downshifted, popping up and down in my seat. Finally the piece of vermin disappears.
Still driving, wary of a police car (my registration has expired), I turn into a parking lot. A giant thud on the roof, and a larger four-legged and furry creature drops onto my head, scrambling, scratching at my face. I launch into a self-imposed seizure, shaking my body to throw off the uninvited guest. It falls off my head, down my back, between me and the seat. I lean back and hear a horrible crunching sound just as I pull into my parking space.
My bandmates come out, seeing me freaked. I run away from the car, as my friends look inside.
"My God, Chuck, what did you do? You killed it."
I went back to the car, and on the drivers' seat was a strange looking animal, half dog, half cat, half something else. I only saw the back of the head, like a half-empty egg shell, a perfectly arranged brain lobe on one side, and the other half spilling out into the seat. I wondered how much of this scrambled cerebral mess was on my back.
That was three am and I started awake, sweating and dehydrated. I got out of bed and headed to the kitchen for a glass of water. As I opened my bedroom door, I heard a yelp. Stinky's head was about to be crushed between the door and the wall. He had been sleeping. I lied down next to him and hugged him, petted him, probably taking more comfort from him as he did from me.
Weirdness. Gotta lay off the sake right before bedtime.
And it's a small room, about ten by twelve according to my measuring strides. The bed can't go. I've decided to take only my mattress and foundation, and live without a bedframe for a while. It'll invite a more Japanese aesthetic to the new room, everything very low, hugging the ground. Platforms on the floor, so to speak. I'll hit IKEA and Little Tokyo this week, get some small pieces of kneeling furniture for the bedside, and maybe a small tatami mat for the little floorspace I have left over. I refuse to fuck this new room up with too much shit (see photo of existing bedroom above) ... I need my living space to be as uncluttered as I want my life to be.
The roomies and I are hitting Benihana tonight. Kind of a "Chuck's Last Weekend in Venice" celebration. It's depressing in a way. Here I am, moving to the burbs, to become neighbor to Barbara Streisand and Pierce Brosnan and a host of other 'beautiful' people. The view from the new balcony is inspiring ... a constantly changing portrait of mountains and sea. I suspect I'll do a lot of writing, both words and music, out there.
Dropping the car off at the body shop tomorrow, which will put me in a rental for a week or two. And there's so much to do at the new job. I'm feeling quite overwhelmed. I never knew my life contained so much crap, and I've got about a week to sort it all out, or throw it all out, and start anew, so to speak.
I haven't felt this transient since 1992.
30 april 1999: inside me over and out: As for 'Amaebi' herself, it's nice to see such a perfect mix of even handed humor, personal insight, and intelligent analytical thought.
30 april 1998: cease and desist: Carli's typing away ... she's pretty fast ... sounds like she's writing a long entry. She writes in BBEdit, me in SimpleText.
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