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21 december 00
----- It's time for a special holiday edition of the amaebi mailbag ... ("special holiday edition" -- as if I've done this before, hee, um, yeah, whatever...) Dear Charles Happy Hannukah! As a thank you for being a part of the JDate family, we're offering you a gift of light. If you subscribe to JDate within the 8 days of Hannukah, a one month membership program is half price at only $9.95! This Miracle of Hannukah is for a limited time and applies only to your first month of membership. "Miracle of Hannukah," heh? Well, I guess the art of matchmaking can be holy. Hell, somedays it seems easier to part the Pacific than to find the perfect mate. It'd be a true miracle if someone came up to me and honestly told me they actually hooked up through one of those online personals sites. Oh yeah, and since when have I been a part of the "JDate family"? -- I've never dated a Jewish woman in my life. Not that I'd be against it or anything.... Dear Charles It's a great time to visit Germany...and for a limited time you can redeem reward travel to Dusseldorf for only 20,000 miles! That's a savings of 50% off the regular amount of miles needed. Seats are limited, so book your reward travel today Dusseldorf, hmm. Guten tag, ich mein Name Charles und ich bin sehr hornig, ya? I'd prefer Hamburg, personally. That's where the Beatles got their chops, and chops is what I need most now. Lamb chops, veal chops, pork chops, music chops, no matter, no difference, it's all soul. Shake. Words are done, and the tune is gonna groove like a muthafucka. And it's weewwy pwetty too. Gotta teach it to the band now. I showed up for band practice to an empty building. I called Ice Dog who said "Didn't Wamba call you and tell you rehearsal was cancelled?" I called Wamba who said "Didn't Ice Dog call you..." *deep exhalatory sigh* So I went to Typhoon with adorable Rachel. I first-degree burned my mouth on vegetable gyoza as I pretended to ponder the "Insect" portion of the menu. Yes, insects, right there between "Mollusks" and "Amphibians" (although "Amphibians" only had one entry, "deep fried frog," below it, while insects consisted of something called white sea worm, ants, scorpions, and the ever popular deep-fried crickets in a ginger chile paste or something). We had some sake, spring rolls, and too-peppery salad offset and punctuated by our usual strange yet warmly fulfilling conversation. Dessert was fresh fruit, chocolate, and other frozen delicacies. I put my foot in my mouth at the end of the evening. It tasted quite strange on top of dessert. But I'm home at a decent hour and may even get a decent sleep tonight. I hope so ... I've an important proposal to write in the morning. 21 de cember 1999: lunch break : The last thing I remember was satan approaching from Malibu Canyon in a golf cart. It was at that point that my subconscious must have said "This is way too fucked up, you're going to wake up now."21 december 1998: : didn't write 21 december 1997: thoughts of spirit : Had I not been living for five years in the land of palm trees and ultraclement weather, forty degrees probably wouldn't seem so shocking to my delicate nerve endings. But alas, my blood has thinned. I'm a wimp. I admit it. [ swim back | email me | swim ahead ] |
