I lit candles, candles I bought in early 1998 in a last-ditch romantic hope to woo back an ex who later became a current and has now become an ex again. She never did experience these candles, and I never did use them, until tonight. And now, finally, I'm glad I have them.

General Electric can give me any form of incandescent illumination they invent, but nothing will ever compare to candlelight. Candlelight holds an inherent romanticism, too obviously absent in any electrically powered luminescense.

Funny ... the whole of LA is probably watching the news right now, learning about how my little neighborhood in Venice is without power. And here I am, no television, no radio, nothing ... I have no idea how long I'll be in darkness.

The candles smell nice, though...

Just snapped a picture of myself in candlelight. The shadows are incredible. I hope it comes across in the pic. So much distinction between light and dark, the shadows so severe...

I'm getting very redundant, aren't I?

As it was, I showed up rather disheveled, because that's how I'm dressing for work these days, half out of a lack of respect for my employers, and half out of a lack of respect for myself. It was a shame, because one of my dinner companions was rather interesting and attractive to me ... a much better prospect than the faceless females I've been trying to hook myself up within the free-trial-ville of match.com, matchmaker.com, and jdate.com this past week. (don't ask) She offered to drive me home. I accepted. She wanted a hug when I left the car (I dunno, maybe she felt bad because the neighborhood was blacked out) -- it wound up being an awkward kiss on the cheek ... which I had already reluctantly accepted from the other two females we had just left, so I automatically assumed it was the "proper move" of the evening. How else does a shy single horny nice guy behave in such a circumstance, in the company of three women he never met before suddenly narrowed down to one woman he never met before, that one said woman coincidentally being the most attractive to him of the three?

What the fuck am I saying?

Nothing, really.

She loaded me up with magazines as I left (she works for a magazine --- I was in the magazine business for four years, but she didn't know that, or did she???) --- ugh, now I'm thinking I probably could have been really forward and invited her up to experience the wonderful romanticism of candlelight at the beach, gotten my hopes up for an incredible evening of quiet conversation, maybe cuddling, maybe even a kiss. Lord, I feel so desparate. Why haven't I mentioned getting laid yet?

Probably because that doesn't mean shit to me.

Either way, I'd like to meet her again, in daylight, electric light, sober light, any kind of light ....

I can't even say I was attracted to her. She was just ... intriguing. I want to know more.

Yep, power's back, blackout is over, and so is this entry. Time to upload, time to sleep.